Ellen Krug - Getting to Ellen

2013, Ellen Krug, English, USA,

Full title: "Getting to Ellen: A Memoir about Love, Honesty and Gender Change" by Ellen Krug.

"What is the price of living an authentic life? Ellen Krug knows. "Getting to Ellen" details the "gender journey" taken by Ellen Krug, a woman born into a male body. As a man, "Ed" Krug had everything anyone could ever want: the love of a soul mate named Lydia, two beautiful daughters, a house in the best neighborhood, a successful trial lawyer's career--a Grand Plan life so picture-perfect it inspired a beautiful pastel drawing.

In a quest to find inner peace, Ed gradually confronted fear and loss, including the residue of growing up in an alcoholic household and a parent's suicide.

As this page-turning story of self-discovery unfolds, the reader understands that for Ed to live authentically as Ellen, much of that picture-perfect life--including Lydia's love--would need to be sacrificed. How could anyone make that choice, pay that kind of price? Then again, how could anyone not? This is much more than one person's story about some things lost and others gained. It's a glimpse into the life choices that all of us make--whether or not we're transgender."

In 2013, I interviewed Ellen and asked her What inspired her to write the autobiography: "There were three reasons. First, I wanted my children, two daughters (now in their early twenties), and my ex-wife, Lydia, to understand that really, I had no “choice” about transitioning. I wanted them to understand that gender isn’t something one “chooses.” There has been so much loss in what was once the most loving and close family; I just had to explain why I hurt three people I love so very, very much. (I am still in love with Lydia, but she has since remarried. I am happy for her in that she found someone else to love.)

Second, I wrote “Getting to Ellen” because transgender people need to hear of transgender success stories. I wanted others like me to understand that with much luck and hard work—which includes self-honesty and resiliency—that it’s possible to live as your true self and survive. Many trans people don’t believe they can get to the other side. Yes, there is likely much loss and loneliness through that process, but I found it quite worth it. There is so much value to living as your true authentic self.

Finally, I wrote my book because I wanted to connect with the larger community of humans. I hoped that everyone who read “Getting to Ellen,” whether they are LGBT or not, would understand that we all share the common hopes, desires, burdens, and demons. As it turns out, most people who read “Getting to Ellen,” are not trans or LGBT. Instead, they are straight, and they identify with the issue of struggling to be true to one’s self. This is a universal message, and in my view, so very powerful."

Available via Amazon

and The Heroines of My Life

Photo via The Heroines of My Life