A random collection of over 1994 books and audiobooks authored by or about my transgender, intersex sisters, and gender-nonconforming persons all over the world. I read some of them, and I was inspired by some of them. I met some of the authors and heroines, some of them are my best friends, and I had the pleasure and honor of interviewing some of them. If you know of any transgender biography that I have not covered yet, please let me know.

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Home » , , » Dee Grachek - Love, Me

Dee Grachek - Love, Me

Full title: "Love, Me: Letters I Wrote When I Wanted to Disappear" by Dee Grachek.

Dee Grachek’s Love, Me: Letters I Wrote When I Wanted to Disappear is a hauntingly beautiful memoir that refuses to fit into neat literary categories. It is part confession, part prayer, and part poetry, written in the form of letters that bare the author’s soul with startling vulnerability. Through these letters, Dee Grachek opens the door to her interior world, inviting readers into the quiet spaces where shame and hope coexist, where faith and fear wrestle, and where a woman learns to love herself into being after years of silence. 
 
Each letter feels like a breath held too long finally being released. Dee writes to God, to hope, to her younger self, to the Church that turned its back on her, to the body that has been both home and battleground, to the father whose love she yearned for, and even to the songs she can no longer sing but still remembers. These letters are not simply addressed to others, they reach inward and outward at once, touching every reader who has ever felt unseen or unworthy. The addressees are sometimes literal and sometimes symbolic, but each one reveals another layer of Dee’s life as a transgender woman learning to exist unapologetically in a world that often tells her she should not.
 
The power of Love, Me lies in its raw honesty. Dee does not sanitize her pain or offer the illusion of tidy redemption. Instead, she writes with the gentle authority of someone who has stood in the ruins of her old life and chosen to rebuild, brick by brick, even when her hands trembled. The book captures what it means to live through rejection and still find beauty in small acts of grace, a stranger’s smile, a fleeting prayer, a whisper of hope that refuses to die. In one moment, she writes with the wisdom of a pastor; in another, she bleeds across the page like a poet whose only salvation is the truth.
 
What makes this memoir extraordinary is that it transcends the personal and becomes deeply universal. Though Dee’s letters emerge from her own journey of gender transition and spiritual reckoning, they speak to anyone who has ever longed for acceptance, wrestled with faith, or tried to reconcile who they are with what the world expects them to be. Her story becomes a mirror in which others may see their own unspoken pain reflected, reminding readers that to be human is to ache for belonging, and that healing often begins in the act of telling one’s story aloud.
 
At its core, Love, Me is not about disappearance, but about choosing presence. Dee’s letters pulse with a quiet defiance, a radical insistence on staying alive and visible. They show that coming out is not just a social or physical transition, but a spiritual awakening, a reclamation of the self from the shadows of shame. She does not promise that love will come easily or that faith will remain intact, but she does promise that both can survive the breaking. Her words make space for those who live in the in-between, those who are still searching for the language to describe their becoming.
 
This is not a book of resolutions or easy answers. There are no grand conclusions waiting at the end of its pages. Instead, there is endurance, quiet persistence, and a deep understanding that healing often arrives slowly, through the cracks in our most fragile places. Dee’s letters carry the rhythm of survival and the poetry of rebirth. Each one feels like an intimate act of courage, a handwritten testament to the belief that even in the darkest seasons, the human spirit can still find a way to say, “I am here.”
 
Reading Love, Me feels like being trusted with someone’s diary, yet it is also an act of collective healing. Dee Grachek writes as if she is reaching out a hand to anyone who has ever been told they are too much, too different, or no longer welcome. In her letters, readers may discover not only her truth, but their own. They may find a sense of companionship, a reminder that they are not alone in their doubts or their longing to be seen. Perhaps, by the final page, they will even find a letter that feels as though it was written for them.
 
Ultimately, Love, Me: Letters I Wrote When I Wanted to Disappear is a tender, piercing, and profoundly human book. It is a chronicle of transformation that transcends gender and faith, offering instead a meditation on what it means to stay alive, to tell the truth, and to love oneself after years of trying to vanish. Dee Grachek’s voice is both fragile and fierce, a blend of sorrow and strength that lingers long after the last letter is read. It is a book that does not just speak, it listens, it weeps, and it heals. And for anyone standing at the edge of their own disappearance, it whispers the most radical invitation of all: stay.

Available via Amazon

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