Lara Crespo - Despida: Reflexões de uma Mulher Transexual

2016, Lara Crespo, Portuguese,

Original title: "Despida: Reflexões de uma Mulher Transexual" (Stripped Bare: Reflections of a Transgender Woman) by Lara Crespo.

Lara Crespo wrote her book Despida: Reflexões de uma Mulher Transexual as an act of honesty and self-exposure that few people are brave enough to attempt. She gathered her thoughts, memories, emotions, and the quiet and turbulent moments that shaped her transition, and she placed them in front of the reader without filters. This book does not attempt to construct a traditional autobiography. Instead, it invites readers into a space of contemplation where both transgender and cisgender individuals can reflect on the inner reality of a woman discovering and asserting her identity in a world that often refuses to understand her.

 

The reflections in this book cover several years of Lara's life and capture the evolution of her self-awareness during her clinical transition. Her intention was not simply to tell her story but to dismantle the myths and misconceptions that surround transgender identities. She believed deeply in confrontation through truth. For this reason she wrote words that were as direct as they were painful. She often repeated a phrase that is common in Portuguese and Brazilian LGBTQ activism, transfobia mata. This means transphobia kills. It is not a metaphor. It is a reminder of the harsh reality faced by transgender people who endure violence, discrimination, exclusion, and hostility simply for existing. When Lara used that phrase, she did so to warn society of the stakes. She wanted to show that prejudice is not an abstract idea but a force that destroys lives.

 

Her book emerged from entries she had published on her personal blog, Lara's Dreaming, a place where she allowed her most vulnerable thoughts to surface. She selected the texts she considered most important, each written at a moment when its message felt essential. These pieces span around seven years of her life and form a mosaic of her emotional world. Each text fits into a larger picture, revealing facets of her personality that were imperfect yet deeply self-aware. Lara never pretended to be flawless or to offer a heroic tale of triumph. She wrote about fear, frustration, doubt, sadness, and exhaustion. She wrote about the countless pressures that come from within and from outside. She wrote about the moments when hope seemed distant and the world felt overwhelmingly dark. Even as she described her world as a dark one, she never abandoned the idea that some light still existed. She believed in the possibility of understanding, even when that belief was fragile. She believed in the transformative power of honesty. Her writing demonstrates how emotional truth can illuminate corners of life that are usually kept hidden. She wanted her readers to understand that each fragment mattered, that together they formed a portrait of a woman who endured more sorrow than joy yet continued to search for meaning and dignity.

 

Lara also grounded her personal experiences within a broader social reality. She wanted to show what it means to be born with a gender identity that differs from one’s assigned sex. She explained the daily challenges that transgender women face, from the invasive scrutiny of others to the silent battles against ingrained prejudices. She wrote to humanize these experiences. She wrote to challenge the world to see transgender women not as curiosities or threats but as human beings deserving of respect. Within her reflections she made her identity unmistakably clear. After everything she endured, she insisted that the essence of who she was could be summarized in a single word, Mulher. She asserted her womanhood with clarity and force, making it impossible for anyone to deny the truth she carried within herself. Lara is no longer with us, and her absence is painful for anyone who reads her words today. Yet her book and her blog remain alive. They retain her voice, her bravery, and her determination to confront prejudice through reflection and truth. Despida continues to speak for her, offering insight to those who wish to understand and offering solidarity to those who recognize themselves in her experiences. Through these pages she still calls for empathy, justice, and humanity, and her message remains as urgent as ever.

Available via kobo.com

Photos via laradreams.blogspot