Caisie Breen Casey - Songbyrd: Becoming She

2016, Caisie Breen Casey, English,

"Caisie Breen started out in life as a male. In early childhood, he developed a keen taste for music, which would come to serve him later in life as a buffer against his neighborhood bullies. His adolescence was shaped by attempts to repress the feminine characteristics that so often made him a target. This struggle was further complicated when he became a political leader for the Christian Right. Much later in life, he was able to let down his defenses, allowing him to discover She."

In 2017, I interviewed Caisie and this is what she told me about what other transgender women can learn from her experience: "Read my book. There are so many things. But if I had to pick a couple, I’ll start with the, “Do I pass?” Phase. This is especially relevant for those of us who wait until later in life to transition. When I first came out, my hair was still short and I wasn’t comfortable wearing dresses in public yet. I was more, androgynous – wearing woman’s slacks and tops.

And the crazy thing was, I was always asking Brenda, “do I pass?” – “are those people staring?”. Hell, no I didn’t pass and of course, they were staring. My sweet Brenda always played it down though. But it was true! So, for those who don’t want to stand out and feel like a freak (like I did early on), wear that dress. Like they say, paint or get off the ladder.

Second, and this is big, as wonderful as it feels to finally become authentic, you must realize that someone will be mourning the loss of the old you and that’s totally legit. For me, Brenda had been married to the male, Bill Casey for 30 years and I was well into my transition before I fully understood her loss. We need to be sensitive to those we love and understand their pain. On this note, and I may be the lone ranger here – but I would never have made such a transition without the full support of my wife. My book goes into it well."

Available via Amazon

and The Heroines of My Life