Robyn Casias, also known as Skyler Lott, continues her profound and emotionally charged literary journey through gender, identity, and transformation in her second book, Manlyhood, part of the four-volume series As the Carousel Turns: Gender War. The series traces a deeply personal evolution that begins with Gender Queer, continues through Manlyhood, and expands into The Great Gender Wall of China and Here Comes Meili, Ready or Not. Each book represents a distinct stage of Robyn’s transformation from living as a biologically male individual into embracing her authentic self as a woman. Yet it is in Manlyhood that the author’s internal conflict reaches its most intense and revealing stage, as she builds and then unravels the male persona she was forced to inhabit for much of her life.
In Gender Queer, readers first meet Meili, the author’s inner feminine essence, a joyful, curious, and expressive girl who existed from her earliest memories. Meili’s world was one of imagination, color, and self-expression, but society’s expectations and the limitations of the world around her forced that light to dim. The young Meili was not allowed to bloom openly, and so the author created a mask, a male persona she called Manly. This constructed self became both a shield and a prison, a way to survive in a world that did not understand her.
Manlyhood, the second installment, picks up the story at the moment when the mask hardens into a full-fledged identity. Manly becomes the dominant character in the author’s life, the public face that navigates adolescence, early adulthood, and the trials of growing up male in a world where gender expectations are rigid and unforgiving. Through a series of reflective vignettes, Robyn explores how this persona developed, how Manly learned to stand tall, to perform masculinity, to play the roles expected of him, and how, beneath that performance, Meili continued to live, quietly observing, waiting for her chance to be free.
The stories that fill Manlyhood are both tender and haunting. They are tales of love and heartbreak, ambition and confusion, triumph and loss. They capture the subtle ways in which the author’s authentic self was buried under layers of societal conditioning. There are moments of humor, moments of sorrow, and moments of clarity, as the narrative reveals the emotional cost of living behind a mask. What makes the book so moving is its honesty. Robyn Casias does not shy away from describing her past self with compassion and complexity. Manly is not portrayed as an enemy but as a necessary creation, a survival mechanism forged in a world that demanded conformity.
At the same time, Manlyhood marks the turning point where the author begins to sense that the performance can no longer be sustained. The stories pulse with a growing awareness that the balance between Manly and Meili is unstable, that the act of pretending cannot continue forever. The author’s voice carries both the exhaustion of living a double life and the hope that one day authenticity will no longer need to be hidden. It is in this tension that the book finds its greatest strength.
The writing style in Manlyhood mirrors the emotional carousel of the series title. It spins between memories, reflections, and symbolic imagery, evoking the feeling of circling through time, returning again and again to pivotal moments that shaped both Manly and Meili. Robyn’s storytelling is vivid and personal, often blending humor with deep introspection. She allows her readers to feel the internal push and pull between her two selves, the constructed and the true, and in doing so, she captures the essence of what it means to live between genders before the courage to transition fully emerges.
As the narrative progresses, the book foreshadows the coming transformation that will dominate the later volumes. The reader begins to see glimpses of the destiny the author speaks of, the moment when Meili will step forward, reclaiming the space she was once forced to surrender. There are subtle hints of the love story that will unfold in The Great Gender Wall of China, where the author’s search for connection takes her across continents, and the social reawakening that will define Here Comes Meili, Ready or Not, where she reintegrates into her community as her true self.
What makes Manlyhood especially compelling is its exploration of identity as both personal and performative. The author does not treat gender as a static concept but as a dynamic, evolving journey. Manly, for all his strength and confidence, is also fragile, dependent on the expectations of others for validation. Meili, though hidden, represents the enduring spirit of authenticity that refuses to be extinguished. The collision of these two identities gives the book its emotional resonance, turning what could have been a simple memoir into a layered psychological portrait.
In many ways, Manlyhood reads as both confession and liberation. It is the author’s way of honoring the person she had to be in order to survive while simultaneously reclaiming the person she was always meant to become. The journey is not depicted as linear or easy but as cyclical, echoing the image of the carousel, forever spinning, forever in motion, bringing the reader back to the beginning while moving closer to the truth. Readers who begin with Gender Queer will find Manlyhood a natural and essential continuation. The first book establishes the innocence and imagination of Meili, while the second delves into the complexities of adulthood and the consequences of hiding one’s true self. Together, they create a bridge between the internal childlike knowing of who we are and the external performance of who we think we must be.
Ultimately, Manlyhood stands as a powerful meditation on gender, survival, and self-discovery. Robyn Casias writes not only about transition in the physical or social sense but also about the spiritual process of reconciliation between two halves of one soul. Her honesty invites readers to reflect on their own identities, to question the roles they play, and to consider the courage it takes to be genuine in a world that so often demands masks. For anyone interested in the human side of gender transition, Manlyhood offers a raw, thoughtful, and deeply humane account of one woman’s path through the maze of identity. It is not merely a story of becoming female but a story of becoming whole, a reminder that authenticity, once found, can heal even the deepest fractures of the self.
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